HEAL
Healing from economic abuse takes time.
Trauma doesn’t leave us when we exit an abusive relationship. Many of us continue to suffer from PTSD and that is why healing is an important part of your process.
The financial damage may also be real too; damaged credit, missing savings, years of lost earnings, debts that aren’t yours and so is the emotional and psychological impact. Years of being repeatedly told that you are “bad with money”, that you “dont need to know about that” erodes our self esteem.
This stage is about rebuilding your inner and outer world: yourself, your finances, your confidence and your relationship with money.
You managed through something that was designed to make you fail. That is not evidence that you cannot cope with money. It is evidence of extraordinary resilience.
Practical steps for the longer term:
Work with a money adviser or debt counsellor to build a budget that reflects your actual life.
If you have coerced debt being managed, keep records of every interaction. If a creditor is treating you unfairly, the Financial Ombudsman can intervene.
Consider free financial education resources, as many banks offer these for free.
Access mental health support if economic abuse has affected your wellbeing. The NHS, as well as specialist DA charities, can provide referrals.
Connect with others. The Surviving Economic Abuse Survivors’ Forum (survivingeconomicabuse.org) is a peer community of people who understand.
If you were prevented from working, organisations like Smart Works (for women) can provide interview clothes and coaching to help you back into employment.